I  am a girl! If you're not proud.
Kill yourself
Not me!!
Exams, farewell preparations, again exams and again exam preprations with a fucked up routine.
Festivals, functions, marriages, visitors to home all screwed me up but though I have an exam tomorrow. I felt like updating my blog.
Last day, I was just going through instagram dm and I found a message from a girl named 'alex'.
She wrote "hey! I need your help. I know you're a psychology student. Please help me."
I was in dilemma. What kind of help is she asking for?
Is it regarding career? Breakup? Frnds? Or any other issue?
I texted "yes. I do study psychology. But I don't know much as this is my first year in psychology. "
She replied "I am in pain. My family sucks and I need your help."
When she wrote this I thought, she must be having some issues with her mom and dad as everyone has problems with their parents in this age. (Some normal issues, I thought)
She said "My dad hits me!! I remember since I was little girl, he was throwing me to my room and yelling at me to go to sleep even tho I wasn't sleepy. And I was scared of darkness so he was turning my light off. I was calling mum but he didn't let her to come to me.He used to hit me as well. But 2 years ago he had just beaten me up. I was scared he will kill me. Then he went to drive my sis to school. I took knife in case he would kill me but luckily he didn't come back. "(That day)
After reading this, I was completely shocked. My eyes were also filled with tears. I was feeling like killing that asshole.
I asked her you are from?
She said, "I am from Poland."
I asked, "what about your mother? She never say something to him?
She told me "my dad never allow her to say something. He always take my mom away.
After all this, I was trying to control my own feeling.
I just messaged her. "Girl!! I love you. I can feel your pain. I know what you're going through. How difficult it is, for you to survive in a place like hell. I told her, now you're 18. You don't have to stay there for long. Just ignore. I know it's so easy to say to ignore these kind of things. But to survive in a situation like this is just like being fried in a bowl full of hot oil with stove at highest temperature.
I know she is in pain, she is completely shattered. I can feel the pain she is going through. Everyday, she cries, she she wakes up in the morning but feels afraid whether she will sleep again? Or not?
She just don't go out of her home. People laugh at her. She don't have friends anymore. She is all alone.
I just don't understand what's wrong with people nowadays?
Why the hell the give birth to child If they just can't let them sleep without any fear. Why the hell do they go for sex? If they just want fun? Why don't they abort their children or not let them born.
I don't know what's wrong with the people now? I thought India is the only place where women get molested but I don't know why I am not feeling safe now. I was not able to sleep. Whole night I was thinking about that girl. I was thinking, what should I do? How can I help her? How to take her away?
Then, she said " After sharing so many things with you. I am feeling so good."
I decided I will talk to her. I will make her feel special. I told her "Now, we are friends. I am with you. Talk to me. Share everything with me. I will help you. You are not alone anymore. I just can't take your pain that you are feeling physically, but mentally I will take your pain. I will help you, I promise.
I think I just can't help her. I just can't go to poland and talk to her parents.
But yes I surely can make her strong (at least mentally)
I will give her the courage to fight with that bloody coward.
Firstly, I will make her that strong. Then independent. She never goes out, because she just can't take that pain. She feels bad when people look at her with bad intentions.( As, his dad himself said, very bad things about her)
I just can't understand what's wrong with people? This incident.
This incident, actually made me feel ashamed. ( shamed!! Of being a girl!)
Shamed of giving these kind if Mens right to do anything.
I have decided I will do my best, to change these kind of things. I will tear apart the roots of these evils.
Girls!! Do something!! Fight for yourself!!
We all are with you.
(All!)
It's not about this girl. It's about millions of girls and women who are facing violence.
We need to change this. (We!!)
And we have to.
